"You get what you pay for, but I just had no intention of living this way." -Counting Crows

Why We're Here...

My husband David and I delivered a stillborn Baby Boy that we loved, and wanted. Our first and only son, Logan, had Down Syndrome. Our daughter's smile is a little light in the darkness. She turned one year old three days after our sweet Logan tip-toed away on January 24, 2009. After 2 1/2 years we found out we were having another baby, whom we affectionatly called Rudy. Just shy of 6 weeks we found out Rudy was Ectopic. Rudy was surgically removed on May 26, 2011 delivering another blow to our already broken hearts.

I'm alive!

I survived. And not only did I survive seeing my pregnant friends, I had a good time. There was lots of baby talk and I talked about both of my pregnancies openly. My voice hitched a few times when I said "your son" so I stuck with saying baby most of the time. I thought it was going to be a lot worse, but I survived. I'm glad I went. Touching there bellies made me catch my breath. I remember that feeling all too well. It made me a little nostalgic and wistful, their bellies. In the end though I think I did a great job, and I felt ok too.
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Anonymous said...

Well done, Heather!

Emily said...

Yay! Good for you, I'll bet getting past that "first" comes with a sigh of relief. :)

Heather said...

You are a brave, tough cookie. I'm so glad you had a good night, you deserve it!

Mary said...

I tried to post yesterday when I read about your dinner but my phone of course would not let me post.

I am so glad that things were better than you thought. I am so proud of you. You are much braver than you think you are. Hugs to you my dear friend.

Michele said...


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