What are your plans for Logan's remains?

Ter asked me this question, so I thought I would publicly answer it.

My husband and I thought it was very important to have an autopsy on Logan since there was no warning that there was a problem until he was already dead. We were advised by the Diagnostician to have Logan sent to University of Michigan to have a complete autopsy done sine the one the hospital does is on the brain, and not the whole body. But, to do this we had to just accept the terms laid down by UofM. If we wanted UofM to do the autopsy we would not get his body back. He would be cremated in a mass cremation with other babies, and his ashes would be placed in a vault with other babies in a plot that UofM had commissioned at a memorial garden nearby. At the time nothing else mattered but to know why he died. We needed to know if it was something that could or would show up in my daughter. If it was likely to happen to the next baby. If it was genetic, hereditary, cultural. We both were desperate for answers. Though I am horribly bothered by the fact that my son will be cremated (the whole burning thing wrecks havoc on my mind) and I am bothered that I don't have control over where he is or will be. I try to find peace in knowing that he is with other babies in the same situation. I have to be honest in admitting that it does bother me. But I really felt like we needed to know, and never in my wildest dreams did I think it would be something as "simple" as Down Syndrome (which was discovered through the amnio the day I gave birth). Though, we were told that Logan did not die from DS itself but rather a complication due to DS, and most likely a heart condition. We do still want to know every possible fact. I don't regret my decision. I just wish I could have had it both ways, the autopsy and his body. I would have liked to have chosen his resting place. We were told that it would be several months before the autopsy results would be ready, so I assume he is still at UofM (2 months later). Either way though, Logan would have been cremated if he would have had an autopsy. And we needed an autopsy. But, the hospital would have at least given his body back...though with out as thorough of an autopsy. We will be attending a memorial service put on by UofM later this year.