"You get what you pay for, but I just had no intention of living this way." -Counting Crows

Why We're Here...

My husband David and I delivered a stillborn Baby Boy that we loved, and wanted. Our first and only son, Logan, had Down Syndrome. Our daughter's smile is a little light in the darkness. She turned one year old three days after our sweet Logan tip-toed away on January 24, 2009. After 2 1/2 years we found out we were having another baby, whom we affectionatly called Rudy. Just shy of 6 weeks we found out Rudy was Ectopic. Rudy was surgically removed on May 26, 2011 delivering another blow to our already broken hearts.

An Afghan for Logan

I was recently contacted by a woman who found my blog through Facebook. She is the president for the International Mosaic Down Syndrome Association. She wrote this:

"In my role as president, I know many people throughout the world who do special things for parents of children with Down syndrome. One parent makes a very special afghan that travels throughout the world to go to families of children with Down syndrome. I told her about your blog and she would like to make you a special afghan for you to keep in honor of Logan."

The woman who made the afghan special for Logan, runs something called The T21 Traveling Afghan Project where they send around a special afghan to children with DS to enjoy for a while before it moves on to someone else. She has a blog that tracks that afghan. She posted about Logan and the very special afghan she made for us. You can read about it and see the afghan here. The afghan should arrive here any day. We are very excited.

I am increasingly amazed on a daily basis the comfort I receive from complete strangers. People who don't know me from Adam (or Eve) write the most profound and heart warming things to me. Words that do help, and do make a difference in some odd way. Complete strangers tap into my darkness better than people who know me in real life. It amazes me. It brings me great comfort. Who could have imagined that something so small (in the grand scheme of things) like an afghan, could bring me such happiness, such comfort. Aside from an early Christmas present from my MIL, this afghan is the first thing meant for Logan that I have received from anyone. Validation that he was real. Validation that my son existed. Validation that I miss him and need him and something to grasp. Something real. It's like Barbs's Tiny Tags, or Carly's Names in the Sand. We all want something tangible, something physical that says "This was for my child! This makes them real!" I am overwhelmed by this seemingly small gesture. I will cherish this afghan with all of my heart, and for all of my days. People will know, that afghan was for my son Logan. Thank you. Thank all of you strangers that have kept me from going under. You've all meant and done more for me than you can possibly imagine.


Mary said...

Heather I am so awed and inspired by your blog. Because of you I too blog. So it doesn't surprise me that someone would want to do something so special for you. You are amazing. I continue to think about you and your family. I will continue to pray for you.

Lea said...

What a beautiful gesture. I can't wait to see pictures of Logan's afghan.

I have often said how amazed I am at the profound connection I feel to so many women a world away. They do help and I am glad that you are finding some comfort in that.


Living With Loss said...

That's really lovely and I hope the Afghan can bring you some comfort through your pain.

Ter said...

how wonderful. :)

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